Alissa Heinerscheid could have saved Julie Masino a whole heap of grief.

You may not know either of those two women by name, but you certainly know their work.

Masino is the soon-to-be-former-CEO of Cracker Barrel who had the brilliant idea to change the company’s iconic logo, removing “Uncle Herschel” in favor of something almost as bland as the food they serve.

Yeah, that’s right, I said it. Cracker Barrel is glorified nursing home food (no disrespect to nursing homes.) I know that puts me in the vast minority, especially in my own family, all of whom mysteriously love the flavorless filler.

But until Masino got her grubby mitts on the beloved Uncle Herschel, my opinion wasn’t shared by many. Apparently though, Uncle Herschel was the reason so many packed the restaurant because once he was gone, so were the customers …and the profits.

In about a week, Cracker Barrell lost nearly $200 million in value. That’s a lot of bad meatloaf.

Ms. Heinerscheid had to be watching the controversy with a smile, with the literal caveat of “hold my beer” as she lost $200 million in a weekend for her employer: Bud Light.

Heinerscheid, the vice-president of marketing for Bud Light, brought us the brainchild of the Dylan Mulvaney sponsorship.

Somehow, someway, she thought what I describe as the wine of rednecks would be best represented by a transgender actress.

How in the world anyone anywhere ever thought this might help stimulate sales still escapes me.

And not surprisingly, the endorsement/sponsorship turned out to be a complete and total disaster.

The rednecks who lined up to drink Bud Light, and all their leaders and entertainers, launched a boycott. Kid Rock, Ted Nugent, Travis Tritt and thousands of pickup truck driving, tank-top-wearing, football watching customers suddenly stopped buying the beer.

The total carnage? Bud Light lost an estimated $1.4 billion in sales.

While one is known for bad food (in my minority opinion) and the other bad beer, the common denominator is an obvious inability to know who their customers are.

Bud Light wanted to try and expand their market to a younger, hipper audience. Hence the transgender actress who roams the world of TikTok and Instagram.

However, the problem was while trying to appeal to the market that didn’t buy the beer, they alienated the one that did. So instead of not only failing to increase sales, they saw them plummet up to 30 percent.

The same is true of Cracker Barrel. According to 2023 data, 23 percent of their customers are under the age of 34, 34 percent are between the ages of 35-54, and a whopping 43 percent are over the age of 55.

And what do old people hate more than anything? Change. Especially changes to traditions …like Uncle Herschel.

These aren’t the first, nor last, “brilliant” ideas that turned out to be not so smart. I’m old enough to remember when Coca-Cola thought they needed to change the recipe for the iconic soda. New Coke is what we got. It lasted all of 79 days before Coca-Cola executives realized they had screwed up and launched Coca-Cola classic, a carbonated apology if there ever was one.

And in a week, we get to see if another corporate behemoth can ignore, at least slightly, the desires of their customer base when the pro football season starts.

NFL cheerleading squads have featured men since 2018. And not just the guys built like oak trees, tossing their female counterparts around like a football. They’ve been there dancing with them side-by-side.

For some reason though, the fact three more teams have added men this year (bringing the total to 10) everyone is losing their mind.

Right or wrong, this is suddenly a big problem, right up there with Dylan Mulvaney and Uncle Herschel.

If there ever was a corporation or a business impervious to the political and cultural whims of society, it’s pro football.

It’s the king of entertainment. There isn’t even a close second.

Consequently, if the sport can survive cheating scandals like deflate-gate and spy-gate, hiding the severity of concussions leading to debilitating injuries to its players and work stoppages, surely a couple guys with pom-poms won’t lead to its demise.

Unless of course, the guy with the pom-pom is Uncle Herschel. That would be bad.

Gregory Orear is the General Manager and Editor of the Lincoln County Journal, Troy Free Press and Elsberry Democrat. He would encourage anyone offended by the inclusion, or exclusion, of men on their NFL team’s cheerleading squad to jump on the Green Bay Packer bandwagon, who have no cheerleaders of any sex. He can be contacted at gorear@cherryroad.com.